Παρασκευή, Νοεμβρίου 28, 2003

A week-long game of phone tag ended today with him calling me and saying, "Oh I'm so glad you picked up the phone. I've been dying to talk to you!" :-D

Τρίτη, Νοεμβρίου 25, 2003

Happy Thanksgiving, all. I'm departing for Missouri here in a few minutes, but I should be in blog, email, and cell phone contact.

An Update:

I don't know if you've been following the haiku war that's been waged over the word "squirrel" but if you haven't, check out these comments.

And as a gesture of truce, I submit the following:

Oh, the dampened squirr'ls!
They look like armadillos
Without leprosy

I still hold that "squirrel" only has one syllable, but in an effort to preserve a twelve year friendship, I'm willing to submit an alternative version.

Κυριακή, Νοεμβρίου 23, 2003

Quote of the Afternoon:
"Elevator going up... 5th Floor: Lingerie, Furniture, and Meat..." -- Edmund

There are very few things in this world more enjoyable than watching men dance the Zembetiko. That's all I have to say.

Σάββατο, Νοεμβρίου 22, 2003

Hoorah! We won, are Big Ten Champions, and are going to the Rose Bowl. This calls for a rousing round of "The Victors!" Everybody now!

Hail to the Victors, valiant
Hail to the conqu'ring heroes
Hail, hail to Michigan the leaders and best!
Hail to the Victors, valiant
Hail to the conqu'ring heroes
Hail, hail to Michigan the champions of the West!


It's rather hard to describe the madness here. Mass revelry. Maurading bands of buckeyes. People have been cheering and screaming outside since about 9AM, or actually, since last night. These people are COMMITTED to their football. I don't have a ticket, so I'll probably drift downstairs to the Benz. GO BLUE!

Command of the evening:
"Look for mice-zie!"

Παρασκευή, Νοεμβρίου 21, 2003

FoxNews' Headline at the Moment:

"Dynamite Donkeys Fail to Impress US -- Officials say rocket attacks on Baghdad high-rises by donkey-pulled carts are 'militarily insignificant'"


Πέμπτη, Νοεμβρίου 20, 2003

So starting today, my date will be posted in Greek. Enjoy.

It's amazing the amount of restraint that is required to refrain from using emotional blackmail on someone who you know cares about you. Especially when something really does upset you, but you don't want to let them know that because you know they'll feel like they have to do something to please you. Which is emotional extortion. Although I guess it's only that if you're really trying to manipulate them. Still. And so you get to be sad alone.

Literal Greek translation of the day:

"The laces of your shoes are unresolved."

Haiku of the moment:

As the composer
I am expected to pull
Scores out of the air

Quote of the Evening:

"Stop me before I direct again!" --JNA

If only someone had...tonight was frustrating.

Τετάρτη, Νοεμβρίου 19, 2003

My Crackpot Conspiracy Theory of the Day:
So, according to cnn.com, a warrent has been issued for the arrest of Michael Jackson on charges of child molestation. The lawyers for Jackson claim that it's all a set up to extort money from him, and in any case, isn't it coincidental that the charges come out on the same day as Jackson's new album, and so this must all be a big conspiracy. But really -- how many of you knew that Michael Jackson HAD a release scheduled this week? Probably not many. But now, however, it's all over cnn.com, the wire services, etc. Now we all know. Not a bad bit of PR, really. I mean, it's not like Michael Jackson had much in the realm of reputation left anyway (would you let your kid alone with him?), and if he knew that he would be aquitted of charges or could settle or something, it might be worth it (in a very twisted way) to be arrested...? Just a thought.

...Which is not to say that the allegations aren't true, or that they are not very serious...

Τρίτη, Νοεμβρίου 18, 2003

Haiku of the Evening:
I say squirrel has one
She claims that squirrel has two
Syllabic battle

Δευτέρα, Νοεμβρίου 17, 2003

Susan says "squirrels" has two syllables. I say it has one.


Haiku of the Morning:

Although it was set
The alarm did not go off
No theory today

Haiku of the Evening:

Oh, the dampened squirrels!
They look like armadillos
Without leprosy

New Names for Rock Bands:

Velvet Hickey

The Goat-owning Uncle Tonys

Great line from an email:

"To the players, and any fans interested in witnessing the sheer beauty that is smart people dominating in football..."

Sean, on the Shipman football team

Κυριακή, Νοεμβρίου 16, 2003

Haiku of the Morning:

4AM Fire Drill
An extinguisher was used
For no good reason

The Joy of East Quad:

At 4am, the fire alarm when off. As usual, Holly and I dressed to go outside, and then left our room. We opened the door and stepped into the brightly lit hallway which was so hazy you couldn't see all way down, and exited the building through a cloud of chemicals. Apparently some idiot had taken the fire extinguisher from the cabinet and sprayed it all over 3rd and 4th Strauss. There's still a thick coating of the chemical in the hall, a film on everything. Breathing's just not a huge treat in that space. Incidentally, while we were outside, I tried to talk to one of the Nutcracker actors, but he totally blew me off. Benefit of the doubt says "4AM," cynicism says, "Actors..."

Σάββατο, Νοεμβρίου 15, 2003

You wanna talk about working well under pressure...

So I was talking to Satyendra today (who plays every instrumment ever, well), and he was telling me how he's completely self-taught on all of these instruments.
His strategy: Book a recital on an instrument that you don't play. That will prove adequate entivement to learn it. Gads!

So... God is really cool. As of this morning, I didn't have a pit orchestra, then I heard back from Brian, so then I had a hornist. But then I was still shy a cellist, so I prayed God would send me one tonight, and sure enough, I got one on the bus on the way home. God is really cool.

Παρασκευή, Νοεμβρίου 14, 2003

Today, I am.... The Lone Arranger! Points to anyone who's seen that Far Side.

My goal: To finish all the parts for the show except for Marie's Acid Trip.

Great name for a rock band:

Disaffected College Coxswains

(courtesy of despair.com)

"It smells like tabasco, ben-gay, and goat...it's French butt-cheese" Kyle

Πέμπτη, Νοεμβρίου 13, 2003

Phrase of the evening:
"2/3rds-ass job"

Are there really people who sit around all day and sequence Christmas carols? Are there 12-step programs in place to HELP these people?

What's more, many of these sites have names like So-and-so's Midi Heaven. There's an oxymoron.

Great names for rock bands: (old)

Hermaphroditic Parsley

Fairly Generic Caramel


The Clandestine Hamster Militia

Subverted Linguini

Quote of the Morning:

"Well, you could, but it would be a choir of chipmunks and Darth Vader." Andy, on his patch

Great name for a rock band:

'Compacted Sheep Parcels' -- courtesy of Susan

Exchange of the moment:

Emily: "I'm gonna go on a rampage the next time one of those government people stops at my door..."

Katie: "You can have our plastic knife."

Emily: "Ooh...this is coming with me!"

Who want's to be Mrs. Dennis Kucinich? You know you wanna!

Τετάρτη, Νοεμβρίου 12, 2003

Today's Agnes completely describes my friendship with Susan.

Quote of the Day:

"Now you're spanking the digeridoo..."

Situation for which there is no words:

Finding yourself out in the hallway coaching Joe on his ballet technique.

Τρίτη, Νοεμβρίου 11, 2003

Quotes of the Evening:

"We need to get cheddar cheese and Triscuts. So we can melt cheddar cheese on Triscuts." -- Holly

"Christ, orgies, Christ, orgies... you just can't put them together." -- An anonymous lifegrouper...

Δευτέρα, Νοεμβρίου 10, 2003

Quotes of the Evening:

"You've always wanted to be spaghetti, haven't you..." -- JNA

"And there's not a dry seat in the house." Henry

"I knew there was incest in this show somewhere..." -- JNA, or maybe Matthew

Good Name for Rock Band:

Little Mouse Snaps

Exciting new feature:

I now have comments! And there was much rejoicing! ...yea...

Quote of the Morning:

"Listening for cadences is like smelling your own B.O." -- Satyendra

Κυριακή, Νοεμβρίου 09, 2003

Quote of the Moment:

"I figure the closest thing I can do to being in the Parisian Metro is to sit and do French homework while eating Subway..."


Good name for a rock band:

Herring Fart (thanks to this article -- look at the actual address when you get there...)

Quote of the night: "You're a mountain and the camel is crashing..." Kyle, on, well, whatever it is, it can't be legal.

Σάββατο, Νοεμβρίου 08, 2003

Huge event tonight -- Gandy Dancer with parents, brother, Kerecmans, and Justin, total eclipse of the moon. So wonderful. Excellent thing: Justin loved and admired my dad, wants to be just like him... I told Justin that he strongly reminds me of my dad and he was thrilled -- he had thought so himself but wouldn't say it, but he was very pleased. This resemblance is, of course, a) one of the reasons we get along so well and b) one of the reasons I like him so much. It was, as he would say, a HUGE EVENT.

Expression of the day: "ass-grabbing Nazi," courtesy of a comment on Daniel Drezner's blog

BRILLIANT article from the Economist here about America's role in the world.

Satchel sez: "I'm shakin' like a shaved chihuahua here..."

Ann Coulter Snark of the Week (and last week)

This week:
Sen. Edward Kennedy, D-Mass., said: "The administration had a plan to fight the war, but it had no plan to win the peace." Kennedy's idea of "a plan" consists of choosing a designated driver before heading out for the evening.

Last Week:
Among Bush's "many unworthy judicial nominees," the Times said, Brown is "among the very worst" – more "out of the mainstream" than all the rest! Even Teddy Kennedy, who might be well advised to withhold comment on a woman's position relative to a moving body of water, has described Brown as "out of the mainstream," adding, "Let's just hope this one can swim."

Excellent things to have said to you:

"You've changed my life, you're a miracle worker!"

Today's Village Voice has a great article by Mollie Wilson about Madonna's new children's books. Priceless quote:

In her dedication "to teachers everywhere," Madonna acknowledges her kabbalistic source:
"It is about the power of words. And how we must choose them carefully to avoid causing
harm to others." (Too bad it is not about the power of punctuation. And how we must use it
carefully to avoid sentence fragments.)

Παρασκευή, Νοεμβρίου 07, 2003

On my way up to North Campus to work on the Max Lab of Death, I walked through a swarm of high school debaters, all clad in suits and ties or comparable female attire, struggling with massive tubs of evidence, and completely lost trying to find rooms. Those were the good ol' days. I miss that...

Eat your heart out, Krugman...

I went to UHS this morning and told them that I had a cyst in my hand. After a brief examination, the doctor (or something...) informed me that I had a cyst in my hand and there was nothing they could do for me. Gotta love UHS.

Quote of the evening:
"After the jiggery-pokery, there's a bit of kerfuffle downstage, and then you'll all swan off in embarrassment, but beetle back on for the Christmas carols."

-- John Neville-Andrews, exercising the full breadth of the British theatrical vocabulary

New Words:

swan (verb) -- to travel from point A to point B in a leisurely or graceful fashion

beetle (verb) -- to travel from point A to point B in a rushed manner. Or to skitter.

Πέμπτη, Νοεμβρίου 06, 2003

Okay folks, the best thing ever, especially for the politics junkies among us:

WHACK-A-POL!!! Get yer candidates here!

Ambulances and firetrucks outside. No idea what's going on... I hope everyone's okay.

This article is about my middle school. Point of correction though: we were not accompanied to the high school by a gifted education instructor. Occasionally we were accompanied by a semi-literate bus aide, so I see where the confusion could come in...

Evil professorial guerrilla tactic of the day:

Mary deciding that we would volunteer to tech for her little concert, and refusing to let us leave until an adequate number of people had. Fortunately, I managed to concoct a semi-legit excuse. She can't just do that though...

Snarky Remark of the Day:

"Well, now we know what Hell sounds like..."

-- Scott J. in response to Mary's "composition"

East Quad Sighting:

A girl in the elevator was wearing a large paper bag on her head with a monster face and the words "Je suis laid" on the front, and a collage of women in swimsuits and other french words on the back. I didn't ask.

Haiku of the Morning:

The Prof cannot make
The technology function
But expects us to

To DTR* or not to DTR.
This is the question.
Although, really, it isn't. I know what I should do. I should DTR. But it scares me silly. So much so, it seems, that I am struggling to form compound sentances. Anyway, it won't be this week, maybe next, which means that perhaps he has time to get his tail in gear.

*Define the relationship

This may just be a composer nightmare, but I got stuck in a really awful dream last night that was entirely atonal, and I couldn't fix it. I don't mind atonality, but this was trippy. Imagine if you dreamed that gravity had ceased to be an entity, and then waking up and having it still be. Weird. I had to get up, walk around, and resume trying to sleep with carefully selected music playing. So I'm sleepy.

Τετάρτη, Νοεμβρίου 05, 2003

Good Name for a Rock Album:

Foodstuff Hegemony

Good Quotes of the Evening:

"How true to our times -- every parent can relate to having a three-headed idiot son..." -- Franchesca

"He's incredibly gorgeous, he's got three heads! Just think what a guy like that would be like!" JNA

Me, I'll settle for a guy with just one.

Good Name for a Rock Band:

Rodent Haunch

I am the music wench. People come up to me, snap their fingers, and expect me to produce high quality music, pulling right out of... the air. And I smile, and do it, because I am a Composer. And then they bring it back to me, and demand I make it different. And then I want the scream. But I do it, because I am the music wench. &*#$

Not to beat an old idea to death, but relationships are really confusing, especially if you're working within an extremely codified social structure, like I am. The basic rule is that you're not allowed to like a member of the opposite sex until such point as you are dating them, and possibly not even then. The second rule is if you start dating someone, somehow, which is made rather difficult by the first rule, you are not allowed to be in love with them until such point as you are engaged.

As mentioned, getting from the point of aquaintance/friendship to dating is rather challenging when you're not allowed to be close to a member of the opposite sex you are not dating. So we "notdate." This is frustrating, confusing, and guilt-inducing, because if you're notdating someone, you know, in your heart of hearts, that you like that person, and that just can't be allowed.

To call people on their involvement in unacceptable notdating relationships, we have developed the Duck test (If it looks like a duck, and it quacks like a duck, and it SMELLS like a duck, and it's wearing a tag that says "Hi! I'm a duck!", etc, then its PROBABLY A DUCK). Generally it's good for pointing out to people that while they may call themselves "just friends," they're really dating, so why not just be out with it.

I'm failing the duck test. I know it. I'm also too much of a wuss to do something about it. Yet. I'll get around to it, I swear.

Today, the duck is screaming.

Good article here by Jonas Goldberg from NRO. Why do college kids (especially around here) seem to believe that idealism is a good life strategy? I mean, sure, communism is a great idea, but we've tried it, it didn't work, move on. Or Israel. The Michigan Student Assembly loves making resolutions that legislate peace in the Middle East, a noble sentiment, but scary, because these people honestly seem to believe that an MSA resolution will somehow change millennia of religious and ethnic hatred. And "youth are our future"? Truly frightening.

Earlier this year, before the war started, we had a variety of crazy protests -- "Drop books, not bombs," which was (I think) in reference to a student strike against the war. What the organizers had missed was that strikes tend only to be effective if you're withholding some sort of service or labor from some organization or business that needs that labor AND has the power to change the thing your demanding. This student strike met none of these criteria -- the University doesn't suffer when we don't go to class, we do, and it's not like the University could stop the war if it wanted to anyway.

Another fun approach was the "Make Art, not War" strategy, in which many "artists" (a term I use loosely) gathered at the center of campus and all, simultaneously, "made art," (which I use VERY loosely) in protest of the war. When I say simultaneously, I mean that there were people standing all over, reciting poetry to themselves, playing solos on the electric violin, singing, painting, etc, none bearing any relation to the other, all presumably considering themselves very enlightened to be making art while Iraqis were getting fed through tree shredders. Besides the fact that this was stupid, it seemed to be based on the even more idiotic idea that the Bush Administration was simply very bored on the weekends, and was taking on the Iraq War as a form of recreation. As enlightened artists, these protesters seemed to be suggesting that instead of liberating the oppressed on Friday nights, perhaps the President could be equally diverted with, say, finger paints, or perhaps some nice spoken-word (how dumb is that, anyway...more on that another time) recordings, or something.

Recently, I saw a sign for a "Tailgate for Peace" before a football game. Now, I'm not much of a protester, but I've always felt that if you're doing an activity for reasons of protest, it ought to be an activity that is a) unusual and b) not a lot of fun. This is why Buddhist monks igniting themselves, hunger strikes, as well as less fatal but equally unpleasant things, are rather captivating forms of protest. You really have to care. But tailgating for peace. Stupid. What were they thinking? "This war makes me sick. I'm so mad about this, I'm going to drive a large, gas-hungry vehicle to a crowded city, grill vegan brats and drink organic beer while listening to spoken-word recordings to show my outrage. Then they'll listen." If not that, what WERE they thinking?

I don't get it.


More on that later.

Words of the day: jiggery-pokery and kerfuffle

Jiggery-pokery: (noun-ish) British, meaning "We don't know what it is yet, but there will be something, and there will be lots of it."
For example, "When Christian transforms into the Nutcracker, we'll do a bit of jiggery-pokery to turn him into the wooden statue."

Kerfuffle: (verb-ish or noun-ish) British, meaning "We don't know what will happen here, but there will be action and there will be lots of it."
For example, "There will be a bit of kerfuffle upstage when Mouserinks and the Mouse Prince trip Christian."

Both apparently very useful in the world of British theatre. Many thanks to John Neville-Andrews.

So I haven't posted in a while. I'll try to do better. Last night, while reading Andrew Sullivan, I stumbled upon the following fact, which oddly, explains the behavior of my entire high school debate team, as long as one is willing to accept the possibility that we are all indeed white capuchin monkeys, which can't be that far off. The fact:

"White-faced capuchin monkeys, for example, stick their fingers up each other's noses in greeting." -- Ooshnee!